Tutorials for relationships?


We know that drugs are bad for us. We know that smoking kills us. We know that excessive drinking will lead to an obituary to our liver. We learnt about the dangers of all these substances abuse at school. And if going to school is to prep our young selves to embrace the adult world, then how come we were never taught how to deal with relationships in the classroom?

Lately this song 明愛暗戀補習社 (Tutorial School for Love) has been looping in my head. Certainly it's not because of the music, nor I'm a huge fan of Canto-pop duo Twins, who are celebrating their 10th anniversary in the showbiz. (Come on they can't sing!) But because of Wyman Wong's lyrics.

Wong in the song raises a lot of questions about love and relationships commonly found among teenagers in a whimsical way: "What to do when I see the guy I like?" "Are there any ways to master a relationship?" "Can I rely on the computer to generate the right things to say?" "Can biology teach me how good it feels to cuddle?" These seemingly pointless questions somehow give meaning to a somewhat manufactured catchy Canto-pop tune.

But then, even adults face the same questions. Ten years on, the two Twins members - Charlene Choi and Gillian Chung - have been embroidered in difficult relationship situations. Chung got caught in the Edison Chen sex photo scandal that stormed the Chinese showbiz world. Choi was found to be married and got divorced shortly afterwards. They might have now become multi-millionaires by now, but on the relationship front, they still haven't settled.

Just like many of us, still wandering around aimlessly in our lives hoping for the best to come, but because we never learnt how to master the skills of being in a relationship, we just blow it, one chance after another. And in relationships, people keep searching and searching. Having a bad break-up causing a stomach flip? Cry it all out, go for retail therapy, then find a re-bound guy (or girl). It's just like quitting an addiction - there's no way to quit an addiction. The only way is to find a new addiction to replace the old one. My conclusion: it's just as dangerous as any other drugs.

Now I seriously wish there was a tutorial class for relationships in my teenage years. It might not have helped me, but at least it would've taught me what to expect, just like smoking and drugs.

ENDS

Instagram @missviviennechow